currently obsessed with

This cover. Amazing how not having Cyndi Lauper’s voice makes it kind of heart-wrenchingly sad. In a totally awesome way of course.

this dress pattern. I’ve wanted something 50s-ish for AGES and I found patterns and now sewing machine is dead and I am sad. And aware that even if I made it it would probably be a disaster (my sewing was tremendous fun but also mild panic as I tried to keep up with my mini-machine, not get my finger sewn through and avoid its enthusiastic bouncing sending it into my lap).

Painted shoes! My Docs are still too shiny and look like school shoes so I am really keen to sand them down and paint them. There are also a bunch of awesome techniques for buying ugly heels and painting them with awesome patterns. I wish I was artistic AND brave. Anyone keen to spend a weekend making a mess?

Sleep. I’m not getting much these days. I seem to alternate between 6 hours of solid sleep one night and about 2 hours of broken sleep the next. I made coffee this morning and forgot to boil the kettle. It’s starting to get to me.

And of course, late night productivity spurts. Last night was insane! I think I did a week’s work in 4 hours.

Nameeeebia!

This is way overdue. I blame swopping computers and not having the one with photos and an internet connection at the same time for a while.

Namibia was amazing and incredible and beautiful and unbelievably stressful. Being stuck in a confined space with my mother for 10 days was not easy. I have a lot of respect for her, but we are just too different and just don’t get along.

Getting to know my grandmother as an adult rather than grandbaby was interesting too. She certainly is incredible for someone nearly at 90.

It was also an opportunity for me to observe two very different women and how they do things: my mother with her ‘take-it-or-leave it’, straight out attitude, and my grandmother who is soft and gentle and ladylike (very much a girl of the 1920s/30s). While I am neither of them, it was like watching an excerpt of ‘how to win friends and influence people’ as I could see what they did and how people around them responded.

I was planning on writing about Namibia in detail but I am rushed with work and I can’t quite get my head around the amazing expanses of nothing and the extreme beauty of the place so I will leave you with some pictures instead.

   

 

So…

I have been shouted at for ignoring the blog, and I do love the blog, it’s just that I have a thesis to finish I hit 80% of draft on Tuesday, helped by a giant lot of personal-life stress that make me insanely productive.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but I’m not sure how long or how far or how much sacrifice it will take me to get there.

In the meantime I’ve found love and kindness and encouragement and support in a lot of places. Last week was the first crisis that didn’t make me want to go to the lab. I feel like I’ve lost and gained immeasurably. Is that even English?

I deactivated my facebook account. then I reactivated it because I was tired of explaining to people that I wasn’t getting messages. I’m not seeing myself installing the app again though. And I don’t get notifications because I turned them off. So I might as well deactivate. but then that takes effort. So yes. No. Who knows?

I starting sewing and LOVED it, only to be terrified by the depressive tailspin when the machine broke (it was a pocket-sized adorable little machine but apparently being dropped a few times wasn’t good for it). I found myself with an urge to paint shoes last week. I think the relief of doing SOMETHING creative with obvious progress-markers was slightly addictive.

Anyway the salt-mines are calling.

How’ve you been?